Life on Life’s Terms

I whined a little in my last post that I didn’t have anything to write about.

I’ve got a ton of stuff to write about. The problem is that I can’t think of anything to write about that will bring a million visitors a day to this blog.

But why do I have a blog in the first place?

I’ve had quite a few of them over the past few years. But i just keep on deleting them. Because they aren’t perfect.

Kind of what I keep on doing to my life.

A couple of weeks ago I was at a men’s stag meeting (I still think it’s funny that they call the same sex meeting’s here in California “stags”) where we read one of the stories out of the big book. It was the one called Crossing the River of Denial, which is where the idea of “surrendering, suiting up, and showing up” started.

And that’s all that I’m doing every day. Except for the surrender part.

I’ll start of the day with a horrible fear of what’s going to happen at work. No real reason to fear it; it’s a problem of mine that alcohol used to take care of, because if I drank, I didn’t have that fear.

Near the end, I didn’t have the fear because I wouldn’t go to work.

But today I show up in spite of the fear. And I seem to be surviving each day.

I’ve got it so goddamn good it isn’t even funny. I’m married to my favorite person in the world. I’ve got a full time job making enough to keep a roof over our heads and food in our stomachs. I just bought a brand new car today since my van finally gave out and the mechanic told me that it wasn’t worth fixing. And I’ve read that there is more computing power at my fingertips than was used to take the first men to the moon.

Now if I could just get my head together…

Actually, if I could just get the hell out of the way and let my Higher Power get my head together.

Similar Posts:

• On Writing
• Self Doubt
• Not So Great Days
• The Benefit of Burning Out
• Transform Your Fear Into Power