I’m A Quitter
Lyman Reed
February 2nd, 2007
Uncategorized
It’s been just over 25 hours since I last smoked a cigarette.
I wondered if I should post this or not. The only reason I am sharing my quit is because Joel Spitzer, the main man behind the site I’m using to stay stopped this time, whyquit.com, suggests that if you don’t tell people, you are looking for an easy way back into smoking.
Of course, this is the longest I’ve gone without putting nicotine in my system since… probably when I was locked up in the a state psych ward 2 and a half years ago. Which means that it’s the longest time I’ve willingly gone without putting nicotine in my body since… possibly since I was 12 years old (I’m 36, almost 37 now). Anyway…
I’ve been trying this on and off for a long long time now… working on my identity as a non-smoker, doing exercises with EFT, contemplating just how awesome my life would be as a non-smoker/ex-smoker. And it was finally time to take action. Real action, not “well, let’s see how this goes.”
Something that Craig Harper said in a post that he submitted to one of the Personal Development Carnivals just before Christmas has been ringing in my head, and helping me deal with the poison cravings:
If you want an amazing life and you’re all about creating positive change, then learn to deal with, if not embrace, discomfort.
Sorry Dude.
Just how it is.
Up until now, I was only willing to stop smoking if these insane cravings and this dope sickness (no, I’m not exaggerating) would go away first. So I would work the EFT and say the affirmations… and it just didn’t go away. They helped, but the desire to smoke was still there. So I followed my bliss, and stuffed more poison into my lungs.
This time, it’s cold turkey, a la Joel Spitzer and whyquit.com. I’m finally willing to endure the temporary pain for the long term benefits.
And now… it’s just over 26 hours.
Pretty neat how that works.
| 3.2 |
Congratulations, Lyman. It felt good me to take really deep breaths when I had cravings, and somehow filling my lungs with lots of air helped them pass.
Sending thoughts of strength and well-being your way…
Joy
Thank you, Joy. Yes, I’m trying to remember to do that… it’s amazing how many times I just forget to breathe, though! Those little sticks controlled me a lot more than I think I even knew.
Great work Lyman,
Keep focusing on what you’re gaining and not what you’re missing out on one day at a time.
Before you know it one week will have gone past, then one month, then one year.
Drop me a line if you need some help to get through a tough patch.
Embrace discomfort!!
I admire your courage and will be checking back to see your progress!
Thanks, Craig and Brian, for the support. I know that the pains that I’m feeling now are just of the growing variety… the physical withdrawl will be over soon, and then I get to learn how to live life without using a poison as a god.
Hey, look, now it’s at over 44 hours… almost into day 3!
Congratulations Lyman! What you’ve done is no little accomplishment, it’s major! Remember, nicotine is no longer your spoon feeding you stored fats and sugars with each puff. Be sure and not skip any meals, and one more day of natural fruit juices will help keep your blood sugar stable. Sadly, most quitters get a rude introduction to the anxieties and craves associated with true hunger at the exact same time they’re trying to reclaim control of their mind and life.
Lyman, see each and every challenge as both a sign of just how deeply smoking nicotine had infected your life and an opportunity to reclaim another aspect of it. Nicotine dependency recovery is like picking up pieces of a puzzle, a puzzle that once complete will reflect a life reclaimed! You’re coming home, Lyman and there’s only one rule … no nicotine today! We’re with you in spirit.
John R. Polito
Nicotine Cessation Educator
Hey John,
Thanks for that… I’ve found the information on whyquit.com to be really helpful, and the videos broken down by day are fantastic. It’s actually kind of interesting; I’ve been browsing your site for a while now, but ended up joining another online smoking cessation program (also free). One of their suggestions was that I set a quit date 3 weeks out. I almost felt bummed about that, because I figured I was ready to quit now.
So I did.
Thanks again for all that you guys at whyquit.com offer.
(60+ hours in… and loving it! It hurts like hell… but I’m loving it.)
WhyQuit’s just a tool, Lyman. You’re the one doing 100% of the work and the glory is all yours! By morning you’ll reside inside a nicotine free body! Now that’s special!
Breathe deep, hug hard, live long,
John
I’m praying for you!
Love,
Mom
PS And as usual these days very proud.
Thank you, Mom… I Love You.
Hey Lyman,
How many hours, and how are you feeling?
It took some guts to do this - good for you!!
I’m at 73+ hours now, Craig… not feeling great, but it could be worse. The physical pain seems to come in waves, but mind itself is just completely distracted. I’m trying to remember to drink plenty of juice to keep my blood sugar up (chocolate ice cream helps that too!), and also have to keep reminding myself that I can’t go out, have one, and then quit again. I am a drug addict, and one cigarette is to me what one hit off of the pipe is to a crack head.
And Tony, thanks for the encouragement!
Congratulations Lyman! Your brain is now basking in nicotine-free oxygen rich blood-serum and acetylcholine neuronal re-sensitization is in high gear! Although it may feel like you’ve left part of you behind your brain is working overtime to down-regulate and return receptor counts to normal. It’s happening in at least 11 different brain regions and in some at different rates than others. Baby steps, patience, you’re digging out and coming home! Yes you can, yes you have, yes you are! With you in spirit. Still just one rule … no nicotine today! John
Woooooooooooooohoooooooooooooo, Lyman! That is awesome!!! Keep it up, my friend..you can do it!!
Pam
Hey Lyman,
If it was easy to give up a smoking addiction no-one would smoke. It’s one of the hardest addictions to kick but you’re beating it mate! After a week the cravings will slowly reduce. Keep it up mate, one hour at a time.
Craig.
Thanks Pam, thanks Craig. Still going…
Wow, Lyman! I admire your courage to tell the world and I admire your fortitude to quit smoking. I’ve never been a smoker so I don’t know what it is like but I want to send you warm wishes and encouragement. You can tap into that magical power within you and beat that nicotine habit!
It’s been a couple of days now so I hope you are not smoking still. But if you have slipped remember that life hands you second chances and third chances and on and on so just start again and know that everyone who ever read this post is pulling for you.
Live the Power!
Karen
Over 25 years ago, my mother quit smoking - cold turkey. She actually did it. I didn’t really see the effect it had on her physically - I didn’t notice anything; but I’m sure she went through discomfort as she did it. After she quit, she began being active, swimming regularly, participating in more physical activity generally. She lived a very good life. Unfortunately, because of what we think was exposure to wood dust (she loved woodworking, but she did it without a mask), she contracted lung cancer and after six years of living with the disease, passed away. Nevertheless, quitting smoking cold turkey afforded her some really good time to really get healthy and do the things she’d always wanted to do.
Karen: thanks for the encouragement! I think I did a good thing by posting this: whenever I’m tempted, there are a whole lot of people out there that I know I’ll be letting down. It’s definitely helped keep me focused.
KWiz: that’s an awesome story, thanks for sharing it. I’m sorry for your loss, but like you said, she was able to regain her health for a time and do what she wanted to do. It isn’t always about the length of our lives, but the quality of them.
Lyman, quality of life is what it’s all about. Be encouraged, and as everyone here has been saying in one way or another, you can do it!
Above all, coming home must be your gift to “you,” Lyman as doing it for others fosters a natural sense of self deprivation that’s a recipe for relapse. We’re just getting to share in your glory.
I do hope your fears have now calmed enough that you’re able to begin noticing some of the beauty unfolding around you. We’re with you in spirit. NTAP! John
KWiz: I am encouraged… and thank you again!
John: That’s very true… I’m not doing this for anyone else, although the positive feedback is encouraging.
The physical stuff seems to have passed for the most part, but the psychological “Hey, I can have just one or two” has kicked in even stronger. Of course, intellectually I know that this is a bunch of bullshit: if I could have just one or two I wouldn’t have been smoking just over a pack a day for the last 24 years.
I’ve only seen two relapse studies but both note that there is really little difference between “lapse” and “relapse” as 85 to 95% of smokers who take one puff (what one study calls one “taste”) go on to experience full and complete relapse. Where you find your mind is entirely normal. Most experts assert that the physiological adjustment can be from 10 days to two weeks. But the final, longest and (thank goodness) least intense phase of recovery is digging out from under that pile of most salient “pay attention” memories your dopamine pathways may have ever produced, those nicotine induced “aaah” sensations and all the conscious rationalizations, minimizations and blame transference that went with them. Here’s a piece you may find interesting:
http://whyquit.com/whyquit/A_Thoughts.html
Thanks, John… I needed those articles and reminders today. 85 to 95%… I don’t like those odds… and I frickin’ love not smoking!
And thank you for all of the support you’ve given. I’m even more impressed by WhyQuit now than I was a week ago.
Oh my,I almost forgotton how long it has been since i had a cancer stick. It has been over 8 months, and to see this story wow really enlightend my soul. Good luck it gets better each day
Terry… thanks for your support… I did relapse today, but I’m not giving up. Thank you for your comment. It’s good to know that people can do this.
Lyman,
I find myself coming back here to check on you.
See you have all these people caring whether or not you smoke. Isn’t that wonderful?
You say
“It’s good to know that people can do this.”
But more importantly it’s good to know that YOU can do this.
I’ll be by occasionally to check up on you just like today. I know you have the power to do this. Wishing you strength.
Karen
It really stinks, Karen, but I did end up picking up the cancer sticks again. It was a bad choice, but I’m not going to quit quitting… I do appreciate your (and everyone else’s) great support.
It’s okay! Everybody has setbacks, everybody has challenges and everybody has defeats!
If you still want to quit just mentally prepare and try, try again. We’re all rooting for you until you succeed! So how long do you keep trying?….
Until you Succeed!
P.S. Don’t call them “Cancer sticks” please.
That makes me shudder! You absolutely don’t want to create anything like that!!
You can call them a pain in the ass, a monkey on your back, drudgery, any number of things but keep the vision neutral!
Feb 4th, 2007 at 3:11 am
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